Thursday, May 26, 2016

seem to grasp

I am seeking something that most can't seem to grasp. Honestly, maybe the truth is I can't grasp it either. It is either be propelled by the beauty of what could be or remain frustrated and the limits of what is. Is it okay for me to say that this can't be life. I long for a life not lived in this way.

chains

Damn the entanglements and chains and as existence creates chains that confine free souls. As most souls can't fathom the longing to be free. Free from entanglements and chains the correlate to a subservient existence I long to exist outside the lines but so many choices have been made to exist with the realms of normalcy as normalcy is boring and extremely unfulfilling.

Thursday, May 5, 2016

automated

The desire to break out of the automated system. Society is designed to make us a cog. So how do we live outside of the cog-like existence. Seeking to exist outside of the margins of conformity of I have conformed to so much of societies clichés. Freedom seem to be a long held memory that I can never truly capture.

Tuesday, May 3, 2016

live long

If you live long enough you will live to see lost. In the midst of that lost you will be left with the laughter and moments of past possibilities that never quite bloom past the potential of fruition. To let go of the pain and the beauty of the past is liberating and at times terrifying because at times I am like who am I without the memories. Shit that we require to be in the moment in the current moments that can be so terrifying. Surprise!!!

not all together

Maybe in the space I can be brutally honest about not having it all together. That to be a husband and a father can be glorious and challenging at the same time. That at times as a professor standing in front of apathetic crowds brings back feelings of being ignored in childhood. So the rage from the 80's interrupts current day brokenness. I don't have it all together and maybe no one was saying that I had to be but it still feels good to say. It feels good at time to say I have no idea what the fuck is going on.

drinking

Drinking has become the vehicle for the turn-up. Looking for a way to the dial up on what at times seems like monotone living. However, is it living to damage my body because the spirit insides craves distractions from its feeling of not being fulfilled. I wish, recognizing at times that wishing is so futile.

limits

if we could ever accept the limits. I wonder if in acceptance that the allure of the grass on the other side would fade? Or is it simply about fading into the notion that whatever notions exist of this imaginary life of bliss is blissfully unattainable.